is there a yardstick of sorts by which one's goodness is measured? is it fair to say we cannot have this relationship because i see you have work yet to do? isn't the nature of a relationship designed to be something that allows for each party to work toward a greater goal all while having the support of another?
so when do you know when you are good enough? what is the gauge...the measure? how will i know when i've achieved this lofty goal if i have no frame of reference for what the goal is, much less how to achieve it?
might it be better to simply sit still as i am and hold my ground? what if i weren't to change at all? there will never be any sort of extravagant and obvious shape-shifting change. i'll continue to be me. my core will still be based in love, honesty, kindness, and generosity. so what is there to change exactly?
bon iver wrote the most beautiful song. in it he says "i told you to be patient. i told you to be fine. i told you to be balanced, and i told you to be kind. and now all my love is wasted, and who the hell was i?"
might i wind up thinking that same thing? might i waste my time and patience on something fleeting? or am i the one who has a limited time in this relationship? how do you know without pursuing such an endeavor? how can you find out those things from a distance? what do these new relationships look like in a practical sense?