Who am I?

I realize that this is a very cliche subject, but it's something that has been at the forefront of my mind as of late. Earlier today I listened to sermon about identity, which, oddly enough was in fact titled "Identity". Clever I know. The gist of the sermon is that as Christians, we are not defined by our actions but by who we are in Christ. Now to be perfectly honest, this concept is rather difficult for me to grasp fully just yet. See, I am a firm believer that our actions do indeed define who we are. I feel that our actions are reflections of our character. Not to say that people do not make mistakes and occasionally if not often fall off the path God has set for them, but ultimately, I believe that our actions are choices and those choices are directly related to who we are and essentially define who we are. So, with that in mind, who is it that I choose to be?

That question truly carries a lot of weight. I want to be very careful in how I answer it. Verbally labeling who I am, putting it down in a tangible form, then brings my accountability to a much higher level. So, here I sit sifting through a thousand words trying to find the perfect ones...

The first thing I want to be is a woman of great integrity. As I have said numerous times, do the right thing because it is the right thing. So often choosing to do what's right is terribly unpopular, and being a people-pleaser by nature, feeling that I may have disappointed someone is a lethal blow to my spirit. This brings up a point that I should consider with much frequency though: Why am I so worried about disappointing people, yet so unconcerned about disappointing God?

I suppose I can move to the next point now after leaving the first one with a relatively deep question. So in addition to wanting to be a woman of integrity, I also hope to be someone who is honest, loyal, considerate, consistent, respectful, and quiet. I hope to be slow to anger and slow to speak so that I am careful to choose my words wisely and take care to protect the hearts of others.

I also hope to be a woman of great wisdom. I feel like I possess a significant amount of wisdom simply because of situations I have experienced in my short life. Granted, I am only 27 (almost 28), but age aside, I feel that God has blessed me with great understanding of the way people operate and why they do what they do. With this understanding has come great compassion and also the capability to very easily forgive and forget. It's a blessing no doubt God has given me, one that I very much appreciate.

Also, I hope to be someone who emulates Christ unconditional love. I feel like if Christ's love is the compass that guides my life, all else will fall into place as it should. It seems to me that love truly encompasses all the rest of these things I have listed. If I first love Christ and then love man and my actions reflect that, it will be terribly hard to go wrong.